No, I'm not.
If someone self-identifies as a woman, or an effeminate man, their speech and action are going to reflect that - because like all humans, they are going to emulate the authority figures that they most closely identify with and admire. So to suggest that it is some sort of act (while it may be in some cases, that is rare) that they should put on the back burner because you think it's over the top seems a bit ignorant. Our sexuality is probably the single largest determining factor in how we interact with the rest of the world, because evolution-wise we are projecting an image to attract a mate. IOW they aren't doing it for you at all.